XI. The Second Surgery & The Angel (2013)

A Test of Faith

I returned from New York broken. The diagnosis was clear: L5-S1 was gone. I needed a fusion. Feb 2013. I met Kristen. We had been dating for exactly one month when I went under the knife. Most new girlfriends would have bailed. The baggage was too heavy. Kristen stayed. She didn't just visit; she became my caretaker. She bathed me, fed me, and helped me to the bathroom when I couldn't walk. She saw the ugly, vulnerable reality of my physical state before she barely knew my favorite color. She passed a test most people never even take.

XII. The Descent (2013–2014)

Doctor Shopping & The Law

The surgery fixed the bone, but it reignited the hunger. The pain meds were back, and the beast woke up hungry. The Broken Hand: In a fit of manic rage, I punched a wall and shattered my hand. Another injury. Another script. Another reason to use.

The Escalation: I became a professional manipulator of the medical system. I wasn't just going to local doctors; I was doctor shopping across the country. I flew to different states, collecting scripts, filling them at different chains, staying one step ahead of the databases. Then came the DEA Letter. A warning shot. They were watching. I ignored it.

XIII. High Functioning, High Cost (2014)

Success & Grief

The Career Peak: In the middle of this chaos, I managed to pull off the impossible. I interviewed at LinkedIn. I charmed them. I demonstrated the technical brilliance that Bipolar mania can sometimes unlock. They hired me. I was now working for a top-tier Silicon Valley tech giant, making great money, masking a severe addiction and crumbling mental health.

The Heartbreak: Then, my anchor was cut loose. My Grandfather passed away. He was my rock, the one who loaned me money when I was sleeping in motels, the one who believed in me. losing him unmoored me completely. The grief was gasoline on the fire of my addiction.

XIV. The Psychotic Break (Jan 2015)

The 5150

The masking failed. The combination of grief, stress, mania, and drugs created a perfect storm. January 15, 2015. I didn't just spiral; I snapped. I lost touch with reality. The authorities were called. I was placed on a 5150 hold—involuntary psychiatric commitment. I was locked in a facility, medicated, and watched 24/7. The "LinkedIn Executive" was gone; the patient remained.

Rehab Round 2: I was sent to Morningside Recovery. I did the time. I said the words. But I wasn't done yet.

XV. The Revolving Door (2016)

Sharp Mesa Vista

The cycle continued. Build, destroy, repeat. By 2016, I was back in the grip. I ended up at Sharp Mesa Vista hospital. This period is a blur of admissions, discharges, and false promises. I was trying to outsmart a disease that was smarter than me. I was exhausting everyone who loved me—especially Kristen.

XVI. The Final Bottom (2017)

Kicked Out

2017. The grace period expired. Kristen, the woman who had wiped me after surgery and stood by me through the 5150, finally drew her line. She kicked me out. I was effectively homeless again. No family safety net this time. No "cool bachelor pad." Just me and the consequences of a decade of chaos. I had to decide: Die out here, or live in there.

XVII. The Re-Proposal (2018)

Redemption

I chose to live. I did the work. Real work. Not for a judge, not for a boss, but for my life. I got on the right meds for the Bipolar. I got off the narcotics. I embraced the routine. 2018. I stood before Kristen again. I didn't just ask her to take me back; I asked her to marry me. Again. I re-proposed. She said yes.

XVIII. Rebirth (2018–Present)

The Routine

Since that day, the story isn't about chaos. It's about Routine.

  • Meds: Every day.
  • Sleep: Non-negotiable.
  • Work: High performance at Microsoft/LinkedIn.
  • Faith: Deepened and central.

I stopped trying to be the "Maniac" and started being the Man. The "Scripted Life" crashed, the "Tear Down" nearly killed me, but the Rebuild is built on solid rock.

I am still here.